Talking to Merlin
by JenPek
Summary: In the aftermath of Season 2 Arthur is worried about Merlin. He decides to do something about it.


Disclaimer: I do not own the tv show Merlin, this story is merely written for my own and hopefully other people's enjoyment.

This is my first ever fan fiction so please be gentle. Possible spoilers through the second season of Merlin. Please review with constructive criticism I'd like to have helpful feedback.

Arthur was concerned about Merlin. Of course he would never admit it out loud after all princes did not get concerned for servants even if the servants did lose the light in their eyes. Since the dragon had been killed Merlin had become a good servant, quite a switch from his previous abysmal serving. As if that were not enough he had become even thinner and had ceased his idiotic insolence. Arthur did not know what to do, he had tried to bait Merlin to no avail. Merlin simply continued to walk around like the living dead.

Arthur devised a plan, he was going to get to the bottom of what was bothering Merlin. He waited for Merlin to arrive in the morning with his breakfast, on time as he always was these days. Arthur sat down to eat while Merlin began gathering clothes for Arthur to wear. Neither said a word. Finally Arthur spoke.

"Merlin sit down and have breakfast I can't possibly eat all of what you brought." Merlin hesitated after all perfect servants did not eat with their masters but perfect servants also obeyed orders. Finally he sat down on the edge of the chair looking like someone about to bolt. He did not however touch the food.

"Honestly Merlin are you completely useless? " Arthur said with a huff. His jibe did not have the desired effect Merlin instead seemed to slump even more looking defeated. Arthur decided to change tactics. "Merlin, I'm sorry I didn't mean that." That got Merlin's attention, he looked up and for the first time in weeks met Arthur's gaze. Arthur nearly gasped at the defeat in those eyes. He had had enough, forget that he was the prince and Merlin was a mere servant, Merlin had stood by him in ways that no one else had. Merlin had shown him loyalty and friendship the likes of which he never knew existed. He had to help Merlin.

"Merlin, please tell me what's wrong, you can't continue like this." Merlin lowered his eyes again and spoke.

"Really sire there is nothing to tell." Arthur sighed

"Merlin you have been walking around like a zombie barely eating, sleeping or speaking. Not to mention you have become the perfect servant. Tell me what is wrong maybe I can help you."

Merlin looked up again eyes flashing with anger and was that gold in his eyes? Impossible, must be a trick of the firelight. Arthur was a bit taken off guard when Merlin spoke again.

"Leave me alone you prat there is nothing you can do to help me. Not everything can be fixed by the almighty Arthur Pendragon. Just leave me alone!" Arthur was surprised to hear Merlin's voice break a little with that last sentence. Well at least he was getting somewhere, this was better than silence. So he pushed harder. He reached out to touch Merlin. At the touch of the hand on his arm Merlin recoiled and practically ran across the room. Arthur could not help but be a bit hurt by this but did not let it stop him. He walked toward Merlin and began to speak.

"Merlin you can tell me I might be able to help if not I can at least listen." Arthur nearly winced at his own words, he did not really generally enjoy discussing feelings but he did not know what else to do. As Arthur approached Merlin continued to back away until his back hit the wall. Merlin closed his eyes and tried to calm himself, he could feel his magic itching under his skin reacting to the turbulence of his emotions. He was so tired of hiding, so tired of doing the wrong thing when he tried to do what was right. He felt like death to all he cared about and did not know what to do next. Arthur continued to come closer. Merlin was trapped in an emotional roller coaster, he wanted so badly to give in to the comfort that Arthur was uncharacteristically offering but he was afraid it would break him or that Arthur would discover his secret.

Finally Arthur stood in front of Merlin and reached out his hand. Merlin finally snapped, it was too much for him to handle and his magic reacted to his panic and pushed Arthur away from him. Arthur hit the ground and stared at Merlin in shock. When Merlin realized what he had done he collapsed to his knees sobbing uncontrollably, it was the end of his destiny, the end of his friendship and the end of his life. He had always known it might end this way but he also had decided long ago that if Arthur condemned him to death that he would not escape. As Merlin continued to sob Arthur began to recover from his shock. He began to consider Merlin and magic and came to a startling conclusion. Every time he had miraculously survived a foe that should have killed him Merlin was there. So many times he did not remember defeating the threat and Merlin had told him what happened. The moment where Merlin's eyes had seemed to glow gold had not been the first time he had seen that effect in Merlin's eyes. He always dismissed it before but now could not deny its meaning. Merlin was a sorcerer and powerful, he had needed no words to throw Arthur across the room.

Arthur had been raised his whole life to believe magic was evil. He tried to reconcile that with what he knew of Merlin, Merlin was not evil, he was daft and loyal and clumsy but he could have killed Arthur thousands of times and instead insisted on accompanying him to face every danger, making sure Arthur won in the end. Arthur could not imagine sending Merlin to die. In the end it boiled down to one thing, what was Merlin to Arthur? Against all odds and class distinctions Arthur realized that Merlin was the best and truest friend he ever had perhaps the only real friend he had ever had. He could have had an ally for magic and been rid of Uther Pendragon had he not told Arthur that Morgause was lying but still stopped Arthur from killing Uther and thus beginning his reign with murder. Arthur was a better man because of Merlin, he had to make this right.

Arthur approached Merlin carefully so as not to startle him. He need not have bothered, Merlin was oblivious to everything around him. When Arthur put his hand on Merlin suddenly Merlin stopped crying and froze. Arthur began rubbing soothing circles on Merlin's back and began to speak.

"It's alright Merlin, you are safe with me, I cannot allow my friend and guardian angel to come to harm after all." Arthur had decided that continuing to deny his friendship was silly in light of this new information. Merlin looked at Arthur in wonder and smiled the full idiotic smile that had been so long absent from his face. He quickly sobered and looked at Arthur saying,

"I have done terrible things Arthur, do not be so quick to forgive me." Arthur settled in next to Merlin, placing his arm around Merlin's shoulders and said,

"Tell me."

So Merlin told Arthur the tale of all that had happened since Merlin arrived in Camelot. There were times that Arthur became livid but Merlin continued to speak, once he started he was unable to stop. In the end Merlin began to cry and Arthur held him well into the day. When they broke apart he sent Merlin to get him dinner and called him an idiot. Merlin responded with a grin and a resounding "prat". Arthur could not help the wave of affection that evoked and the idea that the world was the way it should be, he had his friend and greatest ally back and in a way Arthur had never anticipated. The great destiny the dragon spoke of had begun.


End file.
